What should you do when you find the husband-maid relationship in Singapore gets too close for comfort?
Laura (not her real name) never suspected that her husband would cheat on her with their domestic helper. Melanie (the maid) had worked at Laura’s home for 2 years. She was competent and they confided in each other. Laura treated Melanie like her younger sister.
It was Laura’s aunt, who saw the unusual husband-maid relationship in Singapore. By that time, Melanie was working with another employer. After her discovery of the intimate husband-maid relationship in Singapore, Laura confronted Melanie at her new job. She denied initially before finally admitting to the sexual husband-maid relationship in Singapore.
Laura left her husband almost immediately thereafter. He admitted that he had sex with the domestic helper at least 30 times. The extra-marital affair started shortly after the domestic helper started working for them. As Laura did not have proof of the adultery, her lawyers advised her to divorce her husband based on his unreasonable behaviour.
Laura’s husband blamed Laura for the affair, saying that she had refused his sexual advances.
Laura’s advice to other wives with maids is to keep a close eye on them and their husbands.
The psychologist’s views
According to Mr. Ho Shee Wai, a psychologist, proximity plays a big role in attraction in husband-maid relationship in Singapore.
The helper’s looks is not the main draw. It is more about her being different from the wife.
The husband may want to be the rescuer. Or he may just be unable to overcome the attraction.
See: Sasha Gonzales, “My husband cheated on me with our maid”, Simply Her, 12 February 2015
As a divorce lawyer in Singapore, I have seen some cases where the husband-maid relationship in Singapore becomes too close for comfort.
A recent case of how the husband-maid relationship in Singapore led to divorce
In one recent case where I represented the husband, the husband claimed that there was nothing between him and the domestic helper. However, he would always be siding the helper when the wife blamed her for something that went wrong in the house. This led to suspicion and the wife’s insistence that the domestic helper be sent back to her home country. The husband refused and this led the wife to conclude that there indeed was something going on between him and the maid. This led to their divorce.
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